Being hyper-feminine and liking pink is NOT a crime!

4/30/2023

I've been watching a lot of commentary videos on YouTube (as per usual), and my favorite YouTuber, Khadija Mbowe, said that 'society demonizes hyper-femininity, but expects all women or feminine-presenting people to be hyperfeminine... or something along those lines! Society has deemed being feminine as weaker. When folks are hyper-feminine, society often sees them as sensitive, weaker, passive, and submissive. But being feminine isn’t really a role… it’s an energy, a feeling even. There are so many examples of this, like in the STEM field, when women are hyper-feminine they are viewed as bimbos. This is in my experience, at least... I remember watching a TikTok about a STEM major who was hyper-feminine and was looked at weirdly for coming to class with a pink calculator, and her supplies were 'feminine' colors. A guy even asked her if she was in the right classroom??? It's interesting to note that studies have revealed that many students consider overly feminine girls to lack the independence and focus needed to pursue a career in STEM. LIKE HELLO… She also noticed most of the girls looked at her weirdly too, like being a 'girly girly' in this field was crazy. Embracing femininity in all of its aspects should be viewed as a strength rather than a restriction. It serves as a reminder that true gender equality requires an inclusive awareness of the complex essence of femininity. By breaking down these prejudices, we may create a more inclusive and vibrant future in all fields..

ANYWAYS, we observe this pattern in movies like Mean Girls and various other 90s-2000s films. The popular hyper-feminine girl is invariably portrayed as the mean girl who bullies or ridicules the tomboy character. This representation can inadvertently lead young girls to reject femininity, fearing association with cruelty and mistreatment. I understand this might be a bit of a rant, but it's an observation I've made! I've noticed that many younger girls, including myself , often attempted to distance ourselves from femininity. Society's message was clear: being a 'girly girl' was equated with weakness. We felt pressured to renounce it to avoid that perception. Yet, paradoxically, if you don't conform to feminine norms, society is quick to show disrespect and even ridicule you. This is particularly true for women of color (WOC).

(something that I paraphrased for an article titled The Denigration of the Hyper-Feminine Woman)Straight feminine guys are made fun of, but feminine gay men are frequently shunned to a greater extent As hyper-feminine people must be attracted to men, lesbian feminine women are frequently accused of lying about their sexual orientation. It can be difficult for transgender women and men to fit into or be accepted by these optional identities of femininity and masculinity.

In actuality, gender binary thinking is deeply ingrained in our culture. They are an inaccurate reflection of who we are as people, even though they only accurately capture a small portion of who we are. Whether it's presuming that hyper-feminine characters can't succeed in STEM fields or blaming trans individuals of not being "feminine enough" to be who they are in fact. It is taking on more of a role than is required.

Some of yall have an unhealthy relationship with love and it's v bothersome

5/1/23

LOL, I'm projecting. But why do so many of us believe that in order to be content with our life and with who we are, we must find a partner? It's strange how we hold ourselves to such an unattainable standard, which is directly at odds with the majority of us who advocate loving yourself first before loving others. When we can't even do it for ourselves, we can't expect someone else to love us, accept all of our emotional baggage, and accept us for who we are. It absolutely blows my mind how much social media has warped our perceptions of what self-love and love should be.

OH EM GEEE.It's absurd to assume that so many influencers constantly advise us on how to conduct ourselves but are incapable of doing the same for themselves. Additionally, it might be difficult to keep up with oneself because we are constantly expanding and changing, making loving ourselves both unclear and simple.