Bambi'sDIARY

It is now 8.48 pm my homework is not done and I’m failing 3-4 of my classes(With a F). I’m accompanied by no one but my music playing on my laptop…while my AirPods are dead so it’s not as moody as I’d like it to be. ANYWAYS… the past month I’ve been feeling mega lonely like I have no really. I broke up with my ex-boyfriend a few months ago and I basically split from my friend group a few months after. To put the cherry on top I’m no longer friends with my “best friend”. All these events have led me to where I am rn… alone tbh I have people to “talk to” but for some reason it feels off…like I’m bothering them and idk it feels off. I’m always skipping school bc I feel like everyone is judging me every time I’m doing something so I’m never truly out of my shell and always living in shame and embarrassment.

I feel like no one really knows me…as corny as that sounds. I no longer have social media (except Discord and Pinterest) so I’m playing games more often than I was before…like Roblox, the new vc feature has kept me a lot of company and filled the hole in my social life for a few hours…but AFTER it comes back and I’m back at square one tbh. I long for an ACTUAL friend group that goes out and do stupid shit and a partner who actually has goals and that actually has similar interests as me and idk shows me they care and is in tune with their emotion and won’t make me feel small. A friend group that goes to parties, supports each other, and laughs all the time. That’s all I really want rn..PLUS BETTER GRADES LOL but yeah.. That’s all i long for it feels nice to let this all out tbh ty for reading(I HOPE U ENJOYED HAVE A GOOD ONE LOVE UUU)

DONT JUDE ME TOO HARD LOL

It’s 8:26 am and I’m sitting and class doing nothing. The class I’m currently in is culinary and we’re preparing for our final exam. Surprisingly this is one of the classes I have an A in which isn’t surprising and it makes me v happy. School makes me feel so… insecure in a sense when you’re here you are defined by your grades and no one ever factors in what may causing these bad grades. Maybe I’m making excuses for myself..who knows. But that feeling of loneliness that I had is still lingering in the back of my mind just not as prevalent. I forgot my AirPods so that kinda sucks and my teacher just changed up my whole group for our final exam…so I’m very upset. I liked my group. But that's about all for today… THANK U FOR READING I LOVE UUU

DONT JUDGE ME TOOOOOO HARD.

It is 7:47am and I’m in a great mood. I had a very good past two days! Yesterday at school I had a really good conversation plus idk felt like me and my friends got a lot closer. I also clean my room(it was a lil bad had a bit of a depressive episode ) which has made my whole day better. Got me feeling refreshed and shi… I’m still a lil insecure about certain things but I’m tryna focus on the bigger and positive things which I’m proud of. I’ve also been sober from social media for about like 3 weeks (YAYYYYYYYYYY) and tbh I’m feeling a lot better without it… I also got one of my F’s up to a C only two left to go! I also am slowly getting myself out of negative habits of comparing myself to others by correcting my thoughts by saying things such as “she doesn’t control how she looks” “it’s genetics and that's okay” or “You’re beautiful as well”. So I for sure have had a confidence booster…

noww i need to work on self-discipline and bettering myself even more. OH AND MY MOM SAID I COULD GET THERAPY AND WE ARE ON TALKING TERMS NOW IM HAPPY! Plus i made some cool new friends who i kinda speak to everyday

DONT JUDGE ME 2 HARD ILYYYYYYY

SO... today was a pretty good day! Skipped one class, had a great time with friends and got a lot of work done. I do have homeowrk to do and its 11:33pm and I woke up from a 4 hour nap 2 hours ago. I stayed on youtube and watched corny ass sim 4 videos(they give me serotoin). I do plan to do my homework once I feel like sitting at my desk lol. BUT GUYS...LET ME TELL YOU... this boy I've had a crush on since last yr got a gf and im sooooooooooooo sad. WELL not rlly lol just a lil taken back bc he was flriting with me a few weeks before and I thought that was my man fr(EVEN THOUGH I DID NOT WANT HIM FRL I WAS JUS BORED) but damn. I wish them luckk

I'm leanring how to be ok with being okay with being alone. I have kinda of accepted that once I find my really close friends I'll know and the time will come. I've just being enjoying my own company and ngl I love it it's nice to be able to be my true self when people aren't around and to be able to jus vibe after a LONGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG day at school. ANyways I dont have anything else to say tbh except that I wanna start reading again.. I stopped but imma pick it back up again. I also really wanna get better at coding my own shrines but I'm scared I'll mess it up and give up on the whole project. SOOOO imma plan it out once I'm done with my school work

ANYWAYS PLS DONT JUDE ME I LOVE YOU AND HOPE U HAVE A GREATTTTTTTTTTT MORNING/NIGHT/AFTERNOON. LOVE uuuu

Hey! OH EM GEEE… I haven’t been on my website in forever there have been soooo many things going on with me tbh… SO A QUICK LIL CATCH-UP WILL DO! I’m not struggling that much mentally anymore I have learned to enjoy my time alone! School also started back and I’ve been doing a lot better academically and missed less & less school. Tbh life has been good although I’ve had lot of up and downs..I just learned to lived through the emotion and call it a day tbh! I’m very proud of myself for bettering myself

ALSOOO, I wanna start taking care of this website again so I shall I miss coding so much and learning and tweaking people templates and making my own I LITERALLY LOVE ITTTTTTTTT… I also plan to pick up more hobbies and better myself and learn a lot more sooo… YEAH LOVE U INTERNET!!!!

I DONT CARE FOR MY GRAMMAR RN #SORRY LUV U!!!.